Modern Day Pharisee?

I've grown up in the church. I've grown up in religion. I've grown up knowing the right things to say and the right things to do and the right ways to act. I've grown up knowing what to hide, and what to conceal behind my smile. I'm fine - how are you? Sound familiar?

Growing up, I don't recall a time when I missed Sunday morning, Sunday night or Wednesday evening services. It was a family thing. We did it - rain or shine, ice or snow. Check the box, we made it. Ever hear the statement "As long as you're under my roof?". Growing up, I did - not many times because I knew what it meant and I went. When I didn't go - it was easier to lie and say I was somewhere else than to say I sat at home and watched the Cowboys! Even after I got married, the Sunday morning call would come - really missed you at church this morning. Check that box!

I know everyone meant well! I know they loved church and loved family and were blessed to be where they were - and after we had kids, we began to do much of the same things. The question has never been did we show up - for me it is did we show up for the right reason? I've struggled - I have to admit it! I can't always say that my favorite time has been walking into the church building one more time. Finding a class to go to that I felt enriched and encouraged was a challenge. Is that what this is all about? There would times that I'd rather be in a dentist chair - in the 1800's!

Why is that? I'm sure many people feel the same way I have felt for years. It's fairly obvious. People are turned off by "religion". Going through the motions. Showing up just to say we have been there. And then there is the longing to do something different. Surely Father gets tired of 2 songs, a prayer... Heaven forbid if we change something. Can you imagine if you had been watching a rerun every week on television for years? Boy, can't wait to watch it again tonight! Wonder who will play the characters? But - we better not miss it - who knows what might happen?

Is Satan enjoying this one? I bet he is.

So, maybe I should tell you that I've had an attitude shift. I now can't wait to be in His presence. I long for an opportunity to spend time in worship. I get up in the mornings to go for a walk just to spend some time in prayer before the day and to be blessed by the presence of the Spirit. Why now - why not before? Surely nothing has changed that dramatically that I would now say that "finally, something is provided that I can participate in and fulfill me". See, I believe it is simply the Spirit being active in my life. The Spirit penetrating me to a point that I can say "I want more - I need more, fill me Lord". And He responds, anxious to love me as much as I love Him.

You see, religion is not the key to success, neither is a name on a building or a check in a box. We began to accept the lie! We started believing that religion was more important than relationship, our knowledge more important than grace. We started buying into the lie that our own human reasoning would win out over walking in faith, that our programs were more important in reaching the lost than following the will of the Holy Spirit. We cherish the musical tradition more than worship of the Father. Yes, we put laws ahead of love. If we put the traditions we keep up against the scripture we read - which one will win?

I don't have any answers. Half the time, I don't even know what the question is. I do know that I'm tired of going up against and being the modern day Pharisee. I now refuse to concede. I will never again lose ground. I no longer worry. I make a choice every day, every breath, because I am free. I am a warrior! I am willing to fight for that freedom - it's a really cool thing. Join me! Let's go to battle together!

Thank you, Jesus.

Come and See!